Tully I think you nailed it when you say we default into ‘me’ consciousness instead of ‘we’ consciousness, and how being aware of this is essential if we want change.
Of course this idea goes for, we could say, all macro and micro issues, especially if we believe ‘everything is relationships’.
I’ve certainly been stuck in the ‘I’ve got it harder than you’ story, but I’ve also been stuck in another kind of imbalance and ‘me’ consciousness, where I’ve not wanted to be ‘that’ woman who says ‘no you can’t go for a surf I need your help’ and therefore bypassed not only my own needs but the needs of the family - of the ‘we’.
I’ve been practising more of this lately, dropping the ‘i don’t wanna be THAT woman’ BS and being attuned to what’s most needed for the ‘we’. A big fat relief!
I love how we now have a concept to explain this. Just yesterday we caught ourselves starting going back and forth about who had the worst night and therefore should get to rest, then we simply noticed it and said ”we’re racing to the bottom now, huh?” , could ease out of it and even laugh at ourselves 💪💪
Tully I think you nailed it when you say we default into ‘me’ consciousness instead of ‘we’ consciousness, and how being aware of this is essential if we want change.
Of course this idea goes for, we could say, all macro and micro issues, especially if we believe ‘everything is relationships’.
I’ve certainly been stuck in the ‘I’ve got it harder than you’ story, but I’ve also been stuck in another kind of imbalance and ‘me’ consciousness, where I’ve not wanted to be ‘that’ woman who says ‘no you can’t go for a surf I need your help’ and therefore bypassed not only my own needs but the needs of the family - of the ‘we’.
I’ve been practising more of this lately, dropping the ‘i don’t wanna be THAT woman’ BS and being attuned to what’s most needed for the ‘we’. A big fat relief!
Yep love that.
The pendulum can swing both ways and it’s about skillfully finding that middle ground.
“What do I need? What do you need? What do we need?”
That bloody pendulum!
Yes indeed, somewhere in the middle
Ah I love this conversation and honestly feel like it could be a whole book!
I love how we now have a concept to explain this. Just yesterday we caught ourselves starting going back and forth about who had the worst night and therefore should get to rest, then we simply noticed it and said ”we’re racing to the bottom now, huh?” , could ease out of it and even laugh at ourselves 💪💪